Thankfulness: You Go, God!

I am happy, thrilled, and very excited to see God work! My best friend got a flight out of the country yesterday evening! . . .and God bumped her up to a seat that reclines. Praise Him for knowing how to give over and above what we can ever imagine.

Off to write diamante poems about Christmas with my sweet treasures. 

PRAISE YOU LORD!!

It WAS Friday. . .

This week was nutty, but extremely enjoyable! :-) Here are a few humorous things I want to remember. . .you may not find them funny, but this is how I remember the things I love. :-)

1. One of my students has a thing about the days of the week. He CONSTANTLY talks about Friday now. It's only been going on about 3 weeks, but whew, it's a daily battle. Every time I hear my name, "Ms. _______. . .," I know what is coming. "Today is Friday. It's Friday. Today is Thursday and Friday. These are my days. Guess what? Today is Friday!" That's what's coming. Apparently, he and his sister and mom had a countdown for Halloween . . .and ever since then, it's all about Friday. The funny part is that other teachers and people play along. They correct him. . .but then he's saying the same thing again. It's hilarious because he really does know it's Friday. My wonderful, well-meaning co-workers correct him many times daily. . .but it's always Friday. And he loves to tell every person he sees that it is Friday. My newest try at helping him stop this (this repetition is from his disability, and I am trying to help him stop this abnormal behavior) was to tell him that he needed to keep the dream alive in his heart that it was Friday. Now I hear, "Ms. ________, I'm thinkin' in my head for you. . . .I'm keepin' it in my heart." LOL. Sometimes students fixate on certain things, and we have to try and stop this behavior before it gets out of control. For now, I am set up for hearing, "Ms. _________, I'm thinkin' in my head for you. I'm thinkin'. . ."

2. Alien hands. One of my other students LOVES the color green. If I give him a green marker to write with. . .he will have green hands a green face before you can even ask ______ what the word "pat" rhymes with. 

3. Fluffy heads running. Enough said.

4. I burned the biscuits in the psycho lunchroom oven. Oops. :-P

5. Mr. Beaver.

6. The word "Scootch." This may not be a real word, but it means "move over a little bit." We were in the gym and my PE interns were teaching a lesson. I told another student to "scootch" so my student who uses a walker could participate in the activity. She almost fell over she was laughing so far. This is the same kid who picked up a phrase from one of my parapros: "Oh, my stars." Now she says that constantly while laughing. When asked what she was thankful for, she said: "Alan Jackson." LQTM. That girl loves her country music.

7. One of my girls sang me a song this week in front of the whole class. It was about how I was her teacher, she loved me, she ate pizza, and we had fun. She grabbed my hand and I was supposed to dance with her while being serenaded. It was hilarious and wonderful all at the same time. 

8. Me, trying to say "the first Thanksgiving." I could not get that phrase out. My parapros and PE interns were in the floor laughing. I mix up words when I get too excited about things. 

9. "I saw a moose in the woods."

Whew, that's all I got for the funny stuff. There was so much more, but it's all been forgotten by now. Now I'm off for Thanksgiving. The bad thing is that our WHOLE First Collection Period for GAA is due right after Thanksgiving, which should tell you what I'll be doing all week. I have faith that the Lord will help me get it done (or I'll be in big trouble!!), but I know I will get bored from the repetition. Fortunately, the Lord has placed coffee and pajamas on Earth, so I can totally make it!

Today I met with 3 great friends to have breakfast at Cracker Barrel to celebrate our Turkey Day week off. Shopped a little bit. I went to The Potter's House on the way home to pick up Beth Moore's study on David. It's 90 days worth o' David. I've studied David's life before, so I think it will be great to revisit again. 

I also picked up an amplified Bible. I like comparing the different versions and I've been holding off on getting another one for a quick minute. However, I figured I go for it today! Excitement. Gotta love the Bible, books in general, and office supplies. :-)

The Lord is amazing. His grace is ever-present and good enough to cover even my biggest mistakes, mishaps, and boo-boos. He never ceases to bless me, even when I'm unsure of the exact things He wants me to do. I am very grateful for God's work in my life, in my heart, and in my head, changing my thoughts and actions. 

Passion: "Grace Flows Down"

"Amazing love. . .now flowing down,

From hands and feet,

That were nailed to the tree,

His grace flows down and covers me."

Romans 5:19-21: "For just as by one man's disobedience (failing to hear, heedlessness, and carelessness) the many were constituted sinners, so by one Man's obedience the many will be constituted righteous (made acceptable to God, brought into right standing with Him). But then Law came in, [only] to expand and increase the trespass [making it more apparent and exciting opposition]. But where sin increased and abounded, grace (God's unmerited favor) has surpassed it and increased the more and superabounded, so that, [just] as sin has reigned in death, [so] grace (His unearned and undeserved favor) might reign also through righteousness (right standing with God) which issues in eternal life through Jesus Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One) our Lord."

2nd Corinthians 12:9: "But He said to me, My grace (My favor and loving-kindness and mercy) is enough for you [sufficient against any danger and enables you to bear the trouble manfully]; for My strength and power are made perfect (fulfilled and completed) and show themselves most effective in [your] weakness. Therefore, I will all the more gladly glory in my weaknesses and infirmities, that the strength and power of Christ (the Messiah) may rest (yes, may pitch a tent over and dwell) upon me!"

Even when I follow the Lord, I still make mistakes, I make poor judgments, I don't work 100% for Him, I fail to be Jesus-like, and I do not represent Christ in the manner I desire to. I pray that You will continue to pitch Your tent over me. . .take me in Your arms. . .protect me under Your wing. . .make me the apple of Your eye. . .take me as I am. 

Jennifer Knapp: Whole Again:

Daddy, daddy do you miss me.
The way I crawled upon your knee.
Those childish games of hide and seek
Seem a million miles away.

Am I lost in some illusion.
Or am I what you thought I'd be.
Now it seems I've found myself
And need to be forgiven.
Is there still room upon that knee?

If I give my Life, If I lay it down
Can you turn this Life around, around
Can I be made clean
By this offering of my soul.
Can I be made whole again?"

God can turn ANYONE around. He's done it for millions. He's waiting on more. As the Christmas season gets closer and I think about the first time I understood grace, Christ's role as ruler in my life, and cleanliness, I am reminded of how far I've come. How many times I've wondered if there's room at the Father's knee for me. If He listens. If He loves me. 

I know that He does. Even in my doubts, selfishness, and flesh. . .the King is enthralled with my beauty. May I respect Him, go to Him when I need to confess my sin, and submit to His desires for my life (Psalm 45:11).

It is Well...

This song is a great reminder of the peace and assurance we have in Christ. No matter what is going on in your life, if you have Christ, you have the promises of God. You will never be snatched from His hand. In the tempest, pray for peace. 

"It Is Well With My Soul"

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul. 

It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blessed assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul. 

It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul! 

It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.

It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Colossians 4:2-6: "Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for which I am in chains. Pray that I may proclaim it clearly, as I should. Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone."

Make the most of every opportunity. Let others in on your life so that they too will be able to experience the peace that we experience daily by having Christ active in our lives. I pray that God will open doors for His message in my life and in yours as well so that we too may proclaim the mystery that is Christ.

1 Corinthians 2: 10-16: "But God has revealed them to us through His Spirit. For the Spirit searches all things, yes, the deep things of God. For what man knows the things of a man except the spirit of the man which is in him? Even so no one knows the things of God except the Spirit of God. Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might know the things that have been freely given to us by God. These things we also speak, not in words which man’s wisdom teaches but which the Holy Spirit teaches, comparing spiritual things with spiritual. But the natural man does not receive the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; nor can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned. But he who is spiritual judges all things, yet he himself is rightly judged by no one. For “who has known the mind of the LORD that he may instruct Him?” But we have the mind of Christ."

We have the mind of Christ. Whew. While it is not our job to judge or to try and instruct the Lord in how He ought to do things, it is our job to be available to be used by the Lord. While we were still covered by our sins, the Word was foolishness to us. It is the same for others who do not know the Lord. God is foolishness to them because they are perishing. May we act as though we have been changed by Christ. 

1 Corinthians 9:16-18: "For if I preach the gospel, I have nothing to boast of, for necessity is laid upon me; yes, woe is me if I do not preach the gospel! For if I do this willingly, I have a reward; but if against my will, I have been entrusted with a stewardship. What is my reward then? That when I preach the gospel, I may present the gospel of Christ without charge, that I may not abuse my authority in the gospel."

Necessity. Upon me. May I not disregard the commands of Christ. I also pray that I will do so lovingly, willingly, and in a steadfast manner. WOE TO ME if I disregard the calling of Christ in my life. I am hurting others if I am disobedient. In my inadequacy, Christ uses in me in the manner He sees fit. Let me not abuse my place in Christ's family. To be a member of a family is to respect, love, honor, care for, and defend each member no matter the "cost" or "consequence." May I not be selfish in my sharing, but may the Lord be able to use me through my weakness and inadequacy to share Him with others.

1 Corinthians 13:1-8: "Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing. Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away."

Even with multiple gifts, you are nothing without love. I can do and do and give and give, but if I do not love these people, I AM that clanging symbol. 

God, please give me great compassion for your people, both those in Your hand, and those not within Your hand.

It's November, and there's much to be thankful for!

Wow, I cannot believe that the month o' turkey is here already! When I look back, it seems like school just started and it was just August yesterday. That is not the case. I've discovered that each year goes by faster and faster. The past 3 months have been a sprint. Let's see if I can make it to Thanksgiving. At least after this week the busy time for drama will be over. "Law and Order: Fairy Tale Unit" will be this Tuesday and Thursday. The teacher and I have created a back-up plan for my student, just in case the line doesn't quite come out. We will see what happens on Tuesday night. The line has not generalized over to the actual play. She knows the line in an isolated setting, but when we get in there with the other kids and costumes. . . .the need to laugh over another student dressed as a cow (who jumped over the moon) becomes to great to focus on anything else.

The girl's cow costume is actually extremely cute. The got a white sweatsuit and her mom sewed on black patches. She's even got tiny ears and a tail! :-)

My DynaVox conference was great, despite poor hotel service. It was great to meet other teachers in my position. The conference was based on implementing the device with the student. I will tell you that I have to spend a great deal of time helping him to communicate using the box instead of gestures and leading people to desired items. . .hopefully the ideas I got at the conference will help him become more independent. It's difficult to be the only adult who can assist him in using his AT device. 

I am excited about Thanksgiving. It's just around the corner. I am praying to get all my GAA write-ups done during the week off. We shouldn't have any grad school work either, so I think I can get it done.

One of my parapros (and her 2 kids) and I are going to have Thanksgiving together. I am so excited. :-) 

In other news, last day o' grad classes for the semester: December 8th!! I am anticipating the holiday season. . .a plan to go take pictures of some snow for my students has been formulating for awhile. The poor kids have never seen snow. That is deprivation. Snow is so beautiful. 

Back to Thanksgiving. Sweet taters, mmmmhmmm!

Things I am immensely thankful for:

1. My students

2. My co-workers

3. Friends & church family

4. The Bible and it's wisdom

5. God's guidance, even when I don't understand it

6. Sleep

7. Cool weather

8. Watches

9. Contacts

10. Comfortable walking shoes

11. The color brown

12. Grass

13. Thai food

14. Biscuits

15. Humor

16. Random trips we take to conferences with the low incidence program (we usually laugh a ton)

17. Binder clips

18. Stick glue

19. Colored paper

20. The value of Hershey's enabling me to use chocolate to teach fractions

21. Hand sanitizer

22. Febreeze

23. Toilet plungers

24. Fingernails

25. Sidewalk chalk

26. My car

27. Coffee

28. Granola bars and the ease of carrying my lunch

29. Music

30. Genius music mixer

31. The ability to think

32. The ability to express my feelings verbally

33. The ability to move quickly without any help

34. The ability to answer simple questions

35. The ability to button my pants on my own

36. The ability to take a bath on my own

37. The ability to stand up for myself

38. The ability to say "no"

39. The ability to hug

40. The ability to appropriately express my emotions

41. The ability to show love

42. The ability to drive

43. The ability to comprehend what others are saying to me

44. The ability to read

45. The ability to write

46. The ability chew and enjoy the food I eat

47. Patience

48. Important Bible Scriptures

49. The ability to continue my education

50. The ability to pay the bills and give to the church

. . . .there are more, but I am out of time now! I love writing these down because there are so many things I think of each day that I am thankful for that others cannot do/cannot comprehend/do not have/etc. Thank you, Lord!

Autumn

Well, let's just say that I am very appreciative of cooler weather.

1. My favorite clothing comes out of the closet: sweaters. Cozy. MMM.

2. Breezy coolness.

3. Riding with the windows down so that I can somewhat interact with God's glory in natural things.

4. Less sweat. This does NOT mean less deodorant, folks. :-P

5. The sheer beauty that is fall.

Yep, I am a lover of the cooler seasons. Not to say that I take the hot seasons for granted, but there is something about a crisp, fall day that makes me happy. If only I could travel north to see the trees. It is so beautiful--red, burnt orange, bright yellow. The sides of the mountains look like fall sprinkles have covered them, but it's really just crispy, crunchy leaves.

God is so prominent on the side of that mountain to me. Maybe to you, too. 

Even though I long to see a fall like the ones of my past, I know that my present is right here. I see God each day, whether it's through the love of others, a blessing bestowed from the Lord, or just that awesome feeling of peace when you allow the Lord to be in control despite your desire to control everything yourself. 

Thank You, God, for this new season and for Your daily guidance and discipline which I so often need. 

Argh, matey

I don't have much time, but I want to write down my funny moments so as to remember them at a later date. :-)

My pirates were pretty crazy in the play. . .but the teacher didn't kick us out or anything, so I am very happy! :-) One of my students is in "Law and Order: Fairy Tale Unit" in a couple of weeks with a one-liner. We will see what happens.

Event 1: My student is supposed to be exiting the stage and takes a pose while I am frantically waving her off from the other side. Then she looks at me and shrugs her shoulders in confusion.  Hehe.

Event 2: In the midst of helping tiny boy number one pull one of my girls off stage, she got a major wedgie and screamed. . ."MY UNDERWEAR" really loudly. 

Event 3: One of my girls came to life during her death scene to fix her hat.

Event 4: Lots of fist pounding with Starky. 

Event 5: One of my students literally fell asleep standing up during the night performance. Wow. She was even more tired than I was after chasing them! :-P

So there were lots of moments of hilarity during the two productions. I'm just glad we made it out alive. Overall, it was a good experience for the girls. 

Off to write up some GAA activities. We sent out invitations for a surprise b-day party for one of my students next Thursday! YAY! 

PS--The Lord has kept His promises! I can see how His guidance is changing my life so much. Thank you for bringing me here, Lord. Thank You.

Unclogging toilets

Yesterday I discovered a new talent. It's pretty amazing, I know. Lol. 

Let's just say that even with powerful flushing toilets like ours, too much toilet paper is still a bad idea. 

"Ms. _____, I need help!"

Situation got handled. These are the things that keep me laughing day after day.

It may seem a little weird to others, but I hope you all understand.

We went bowling again today and next week is Special Olympics. It is going to be great--I am super excited. My kids are actually very good at bowling, so we will be right down there, cheering people on. 

For anyone who is interested, my girls are in a play next Thursday night at 7pm at the high school. . .Peter Pan and Wendy! I am very excited to see them all decked out as pirates and mermaids, even though next week is going to be very hectic.

Whoo, fall break is Monday~! I am totally going to get plenty done this weekend so I will not have to do anything next week. We've got drama rehearsals on Tues. and Wed., and then the play on Thursday.

The Lord is really being faithful and allowing me to make so many new friends. The relationships I have with people are truly growing and I see that my new friends and co-workers are people that I really enjoy hanging out with. I love hanging out with others who are passionate about kids and teaching, so it's fun to be able to relate with people who are so different from me (aside from those two things!). 

I am SO thankful for this answered prayer. I know that God wants me at VMS, and I am thankful that He is letting me in on some of the reasons so far. I pray that people will continue to open up their hearts to me and I pray that the Lord will speak to them through me. Let the words that come out of this mouth be seasoned with salt and full of love and grace.

Off to lie down. . .it's a bit of rest before sleep time!

Prayer, Dependence, and Praise

Oh Lord, I pray that I will praise you in this storm. I thank you for giving me the courage and strength to take a stand in the midst of the issue. May I continue to act in a manner that is fully pleasing to You. May my patience continue strong, and may I never give an inch to the enemy. 

Please guide Your child and help me to take the path that is right and based upon biblical truths. May I not compromise You, my belief in You, my belief in truth, and my belief in love for all people.

I thank you and I praise You for making me see this trial in perspective. May I maintain composure and not become obsessive over the issue in general, but may my heart depend on You and Your perfect peace and power. 

Thank you for giving my heart peace. Perfect peace. 

Please help me to persevere against the enemy and against the flesh within. I do not want to give up. Without Your guidance and help, I will cave in. I pray that You will give me the strength I need to do what I must do based on what You and You alone lead me to do.

I thank You for this day, for Your Word, and for letting it be well with my soul. :-)

Projectile Vomit?

My poor kids have been falling off like squished mosquitos this week. . .yikes. 

We've had two massive vomit-covered days this week, and I am praying against this evil stomach virus. I am so thankful to have stayed well this far. I am praying that the Lord keeps me well. The kids don't deal well with the change of having a stranger in the room. :-/ 

Either way, we'll make it.

Today we went bowling. I have never seen kids get so excited about bowling. This is another reason why I am so thankful for my students. They do not take things for granted. It was like we were on a trip to Disneyland to eat breakfast with the whole crew of Disney characters! They had such a great time. Quotes of the day, "You are swingin' that ball!" "You go girl, be the Queen!" and "I'm smokin'!" 

:-)

The week has flown by! We have a workshop Friday, and I hate to miss the kids, but I am trying to remind myself that I will get an extra hour and a half of sleep!

I am trying to plan an AWESOME field trip. . .I will tell you if it is approved! <><

Daniel & Esther. . .surviving this world

So we're studying Esther in "big church" (wooooo, I love the OT!) and Daniel in our women's Bible study right now. I am very excited about this because both of these books are so encouraging for we who are called to be "in the world, but not of it." We are called to let out lights shine to men so that we may bring glory to our Father in heaven.

In the book of Daniel, Babylon is seen as a city that is focused a little on everything the world sees as "good and pleasing". . .everything except God. Living in a place like that can pull a believer further and further from God. . .putting focus on self and others.

I don't know about you, but at work, I have to fully lean on my Jesus to be able to stay focused on eternal things. It is exhausting, draining, demanding, and trying. The war against the world, Satan, and myself is going on daily, right here where I live. 

Sometimes people only think about those who work overseas needing to worry about "staying strong" against battles. I think that each of us must rely on the Lord to stay strong in those daily battles. While Esther had a whole flock of Jewish people depending on her, I am certain that each person has at least one person depending on him or her. Even when Esther feared for her own death, she told the people to fast and pray. She struggled to keep her eyes on God during the tough times. While my battles are nothing in comparison with her, I still find myself somewhere in that story. 

The battles against myself are usually very interesting. It's when I take my eyes off the Lord and say, "Man, I would love to stay home today" that things get crazy. It's at those times when I have to read my strength verses for the year or flip to my now well-worn pages of Philippians to find the verses of promises and encouragement that I need. GET UP AND MOVE IT, YOUNG LADY! While the Lord may not use those exact words, He does lovingly remind me that work isn't something I am doing for myself or of any power within. Quite honestly, as the days go by, I see how little I truly have to offer without that Holy Spirit (inside my carcass--lol). Middle school was not my choice. Special Education was not my choice. Both were pre-planned, and I trust that whoever/whatever I am there for, the Lord will work me into those places.

The battles against man also drive me to reading Philippians. . .as well as the Gospels. Christ fought MUCH GREATER battles than I fight. He was always successful and never fell into sin. People can be very discouraging. When I feel discouraged, sometimes I want to run away. It would be so much easier to not be in a certain place, to not talk to a certain person, to not call a certain parent, etc. It is definitely a tough battle, but I can't let myself run from those things. When I run, I am not solving the problem. I am inviting more.

In a world that tells me that I am unworthy if I do not meet the criteria for a certain list, my God tells me that even having that list is pointless. No matter what my plan is, things don't ever go down in that exact way. While I am not saying this to excuse myself from planning, I am saying this to say that I have learned that sometimes, the plan just needs to be thrown out the window. My best plans can be turned into tragedies (I've seen it happen) without God's assistance.

Since I'm now focusing on my life day by day, I pray that today the Lord would be active in my life. I pray that I will meditate on what He is teaching me, that I will be thankful for the promises He left for me in His Word, and that when I am afraid or intimidated, I will put my trust in Him. 

Daniel 1:8-10:

"8 But Daniel resolved not to defile himself with the royal food and wine, and he asked the chief official for permission not to defile himself this way. 9 Now God had caused the official to show favor and sympathy to Daniel, 10 but the official told Daniel, "I am afraid of my lord the king, who has assigned your ^[c] food and drink. Why should he see you looking worse than the other young men your age? The king would then have my head because of you."

I pray that when I am tested by the world, I will stand up as Daniel did in this passage and refuse to be defiled. May I rely on the Lord, not myself or others, to send me along the path I am meant to take. Because Daniel relied upon the Lord,

Daniel 1:20:

"20 In every matter of wisdom and understanding about which the king questioned them, he found them ten times better than all the magicians and enchanters in his whole kingdom."

God has the power to do this, and all He asks for is belief. 

John 6:29:

"29Jesus answered, "The work of God is this: to believe in the one he has sent."

HI-larity

Here are some funny things that have happened that I wanted to write down to commit to my memory. I want to remember the fun times!

1. My friend (who is 22) came to visit and do paper mache. . ."OOOOOHHHH, Ms. Rose, is that your daughter?" Yea. LQTM. These kids. 

2. Anytime I ask the rhetorical question "And you know what?", one of my students says, "What?" It's just the way she says it. 

3. When we talked about asteroids, one of my kids was in TV land. We try to encourage him to come out and play with the real people occasionally. "Will that come and blow up the Earth?" "No, but it made a good movie." 

4. We're reading The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. Before we started, we previewed the story. I showed them pictures from the movie and we watched the movie trailer. One of the pictures was of Aslan--the front of the DVD, for those who have it, I do believe. One of my students says (with big eyes), "That lion is lookin' at me." The next day, Friday, she told our ILT's during the picnic that the lion was looking at her. Then I had to explain the situation. It was so funny.

5. We had a picnic yesterday. We also had a dance party. Our principal came in and danced with us. One of my para's took some pictures of it, so yesterday afternoon, we printed off one of him doing the robot and taped it on the door to his office. :-) Hehe. "CAUGHT IN THE ACT!!"

6. "WHAT?!?!?!" You just have to come visit. You'll understand.

7. One of our ILT's came and gave out notebooks to my students. The girls all got Hannah Montana. One student jumped up and down for 5 minutes, literally about the notebook. We didn't get much done in science that day. 

8. During a music break, one of my students fell to the ground and spun herself around, pretending to play the guitar. Wow. 

9. "It's on my hands!!!" The boys freaked out when we did paper mache. . .but the girls were elbow deep in glue and water!

10. The first time I snorted. . .apparently, snorting is the funniest thing on the planet to middle school students. . .and paraprofessionals. One of my students almost fell out of her chair.

We have the best time in the room. I love my job even when things get crazy and discouraging. When that happens, I try to focus on the funny, wonderful things that have happened so far. :-) It's a blessing to be a teacher. 

1 Peter 3:8-17

"Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. For, 
   "Whoever would love life 
      and see good days 
   must keep his tongue from evil 
      and his lips from deceitful speech. 
 He must turn from evil and do good; 
      he must seek peace and pursue it. 
 For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous 
      and his ears are attentive to their prayer, 
   but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil."

 Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. "Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened." But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. It is better, if it is God's will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil."

Lord, I pray that I will continue striving to do good and not evil. May my attitude and heart be under the full influence of the Holy Sprit; He Who guides me. May my heart not be troubled in times of trials. May I depend solely on You for my strength. Even in my discouragement, may You allow me to cleave to You in utter dependence. 

Thank You for my students. When others discourage me, they are what I need to get motivated yet again. I praise You for the good days and the bad. . .because without bad days, the good days just wouldn't be SO good. :-)

Why am I so itchy?

The title of my blog may be an over share, but somehow, I have been eaten alive by bugs. . .or I have a weird case of hives. I really don't know. All I know is that I want to claw my right leg off. Hmmmm.  I think I need that leg.

I had a couple of rough days this week. Yesterday, I had to cry it out for a bit. Sometimes you just have to do that. Then I reminded myself of all of the hilarious and awesome things my kids do. :-) I just love them. None of the drama or issues actually come from my students. It's all of the other people. Too much drama. 

However, today was a great day. The kids did well, some of the drama ceased. 

Sweet anti-itch cream. Thank you, Melissa. Whew. Please work.

Anywho, tomorrow we're having our super fun picnic. . .and it's early dismissal! I can FINALLY go downtown and purchase my car tag! I am thankful for that! :-)

I have tons of meetings over the next few weeks. . .but I am very thankful that after a bad day, the Lord shows me how good everything is.

Someone told me that my classroom was the "Disneyland of Special Education." I wasn't really sure how to take that. But on the positive side, I do try to keep things as entertaining as possible. Sometimes that involves me pretending to be a manta ray. . .sometimes a beaver. . . sometimes I sing answers. If someone walks in, oh well. At least I can laugh at myself. 

I thank the Lord each time I think of the people who encourage me and spur me on. Praise God for encouragement. :-)

Back to semi-attempting to do homework. That's another story altogether! <><

Whew

Whew. What a week. Even in its shortened state, the week was still really crazy! I have told a few people that I think the 3-day weekends mess me up more than they help me out. . .because when 5:30 am on Tuesday arrives, I am never prepared. :-D

This past weekend I programmed an AT device all weekend, which was great. I can't wait to see how my student uses it. I'm thankful I could help the parents out in some way.

My camera bid adieu to me on Monday at the Hill's home, and then gave it's last show on Wednesday. Now she is in the great beyond. . .no longer living the high life in my purse. It's a sad story. The lens just got all messed up and crazy, so now I'm going to be getting a new camera. A Rebel. That will be a new, enjoyable photography experience, but I hate that my good ol' camera won't be with me any more. 2.5 years is a long and meaningful relationship.

Enough about the camera.

Wednesday was hilarious. We made our paper mache solar system. My girls were elbow-deep in paper mache, but the boys were like, "EW, MY HANDS, I NEED TO WASH MY HANDS!" for the entire project. Now that was sad. They are going to have to get over that little quirk though. . .we still have to make a volcano. And rockets. And enact an earthquake. And lots of other messy things. Baha. I can't wait! 

Yesterday all of the new special education teachers had an all-day workshop--half at another school and half at the Central Office with our faithful leader. 

The afternoon was more helpful because it actually applied to us and our adapted curriculum. The morning was more about co-teaching and teachers who do pull-out separate class rather than full-day self-contained.

I went to Wal-Mart afterwards and purchase our new rug and bookshelf. WOO HOO! Now I just need books to go on it. That will be a groovy day! So far, I really don't have any appropriate books in the classroom. I'm working on that. 

I feel very blessed this week. Being a special education teacher is hard, but when I look at what others are going through, I am very thankful for the supportive people I have at my school. The ILT's at my school are my friends--they come to my classroom and talk to my students. They are really the most wonderful people. They've loaned me materials and got me grade-level textbooks. I can't thank them enough. 

I am also very, very thankful that my students are going to Connections classes without too many people getting feisty. 

I have to get ready for next week today and tomorrow. . .interim report cards go out. We will see how this goes. I just pray that I make it to the end of the year with everyone alive. . .including myself! At least I have a super-groovy group of kids!

I will leave you on this note. . .I went and visited my little cream puffs from last year during my lunch break yesterday. They are doing SO GREAT! I mean, kids were talking, they were identifying items, etc. I am so proud. I love them. I miss those schmall little puffers!

Here is what my heart tells the Lord in exhaustion:

Psalm 42 (New International Version)

New International Version (NIV)

Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 byInternational Bible Society

    

Psalm 42

BOOK II : Psalms 42-72

 1

For the director of music. A maskil of the Sons of Korah. ^[a]

    "^[b] As the deer pants for streams of water, 
       so my soul pants for you, O God.

 2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. 
       When can I go and meet with God?

 3 My tears have been my food 
       day and night, 
       while men say to me all day long, 
       "Where is your God?"

 4 These things I remember 
       as I pour out my soul: 
       how I used to go with the multitude, 
       leading the procession to the house of God, 
       with shouts of joy and thanksgiving 
       among the festive throng.

 5 Why are you downcast, O my soul? 
       Why so disturbed within me? 
       Put your hope in God, 
       for I will yet praise him, 
       my Savior and 6 my God. 
       My ^[c] soul is downcast within me; 
       therefore I will remember you 
       from the land of the Jordan, 
       the heights of Hermon—from Mount Mizar.

 7 Deep calls to deep 
       in the roar of your waterfalls; 
       all your waves and breakers 
       have swept over me.

 8 By day the LORD directs his love, 
       at night his song is with me— 
       a prayer to the God of my life.

 9 I say to God my Rock, 
       "Why have you forgotten me? 
       Why must I go about mourning, 
       oppressed by the enemy?"

 10 My bones suffer mortal agony 
       as my foes taunt me, 
       saying to me all day long, 
       "Where is your God?"

 11 Why are you downcast, O my soul? 
       Why so disturbed within me? 
       Put your hope in God, 
       for I will yet praise him, 
       my Savior and my God."

And here is how God makes me react when I see His hand in my daily life. . .when I see how much He helps me. . .when I recognize His grace, kindness, guidance, and caring Spirit: 

Psalm 100 (New International Version)

New International Version (NIV)

Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 byInternational Bible Society

    

Psalm 100

A psalm. For giving thanks.

 1 Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth.

 2 Worship the LORD with gladness; 
       come before him with joyful songs.

 3 Know that the LORD is God. 
       It is he who made us, and we are his ^[a] ; 
       we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.

 4 Enter his gates with thanksgiving 
       and his courts with praise; 
       give thanks to him and praise his name.

 5 For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; 
       his faithfulness continues through all generations."

Thank You, Lord, for getting me through another week! 

Miracles and Thanksgiving

Hola and hurray for time to get things together this weekend! :-)

I hear that the WildCats won last night, GO CATS!

It's been a long and challenging week, but the Lord has seen me through it. Whew. Wipe sweat off forehead now. 

Last Sunday I had to return my old car ("Blueberry" or "Ghetto") to my dad. I was very upset because we had our open house at church and I would not be able to attend, but it was one of those "feisty" moments for him, so I did not see any way around it. I did not want to have to hear cursing directed at me or anything of the sort, so I went ahead and drove to southern Atlanta. The whole time I had some great prayer time with the Lord, and I also had to pray to be delivered. As many of you know, I got a new car because this particular car was literally falling apart around me. I prayed constantly for the gas to be like the oil in the temple. . .it seemed like there was some sort of leak. About 40 miles out, we (Leigh Ann and I) had to stop so I could get gas. I didn't notice anything out of the ordinary. When we got to the meeting place, I pulled into the parking lot and started moving things to Leigh Ann's car. My dad came over and looked at the front left part of the car. At some point in the final 40 miles, my tire blew. Interstate driving is fast. Logically, my car should have suffered some great explosion and spun me around on the road to crash.

God said no. I cried.

As I said earlier, I had prayed for safety in relation to the gas and the shaking of the car. . .I did not even think to pray for the tires. God protects us even when we do not know that we are in danger. Wow.

I thank Him for that great blessing and so many others. He is awesome.

This week was good as well, I have to say. My students did very well with the substitute teacher we had on Tuesday while I was at a workshop, and for that, I am very thankful. Sometimes, for my students, a change in routine can become very, very stressful for them. Fortunately, this did not happen. No one had a seizure, no one got "feisty," and everyone made it home safe and sound. 

I had my very first IEP meeting on Thursday and I am almost completely done with my students IEP. Wow. All week I just prayed and prayed that it would go well, that the parents would agree with our suggestions for the child, and that everything would be done ethically and legally. 

At 6:02pm on Thursday, the meeting was over (2.5 hours, yes, it was lengthy), and the Lord had answered those prayers. Being a first-year teacher, you really want that first meeting to go well. It was very encouraging. I need that encouragement because my position is very isolated. If you work in a self-contained special education classroom, there is not much interaction with others. There are not many opportunities to be encouraged or encourage others outside of your classroom. While in some ways this is good--I am really getting involved with my kids and parapros--this can also be a huge challenge because I often do not receive much encouragement. 

Upon praying about this situation, the Lord has been very gracious to me. When expressing my feelings to Him, He encourages me. In addition, there are usually a few times a week when He gives me something/someone to encourage me and spur me on to doing the work He has laid out for me before time began. These encouragements may come from a co-worker, a student, a principal, or a parent. God knows what I need to keep going.

Phil. 1:20-26:

"20I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death. 21For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. 22If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! 23I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; 24but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body. 25Convinced of this, I know that I will remain, and I will continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith, 26so that through my being with you again your joy in Christ Jesus will overflow on account of me."

As usual, Paul hits my sentiments right on. It would be FAR EASIER to not do this thing I have been called to do. It would be FAR EASIER to give up on some days. It would be FAR EASIER to not try and put together meaningful lessons for my students. And boy, what an amazing feeling it would be to BE WITH CHRIST. To feel that peace, that joy, that love, that compassion. FAR EASIER.

But just as it was for Paul, it is NECESSARY to press on. It is NECESSARY to continue these works God has prepared in advance for me to do. 

In addition, it gives me joy to press on. Joy to continue. And joy to know that Christ is who gives me my strength. Because of this job, I HAVE NO OTHER CHOICE but to run to God. He understands every situation I am in. Christ experienced all things. He knows that sometimes, I may not have joy. I may just be walking in obedience with Him. However, He spurs me on and gives me joy each morning. I am thankful that there is grace. . .so thankful. 

Heb. 4:14-16:

"14Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens,^[a] Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. 15For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin. 16Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need."

When I feel weak at work, I know that I can run to Christ. I know that I can talk to Him because He has experienced the very same feelings I have. Christ has cried with compassion, Christ has been hurt and scorned by others, Christ has experienced these things and FAR WORSE. WITHOUT SIN. WITHOUT DOUBTS. WITHOUT HUMAN WEAKNESS. WITHOUT COMPLANING. WITHOUT QUESTIONING. WITHOUT DOUBTING GOD'S CALLING AND GUIDANCE. 

I have human weakness. I cannot always continue on like Christ. And I certainly cannot do anything without Christ. Each day is a battle. A battle against Satan, a battle against sin, a battle against myself, a battle against sin, a battle against control, a battle against worry, a battle against giving up, a battle against the unknown, a battle against the known. And more. 

BUT LORD MAY I APPROACH THE THRONE OF GRACE. . . .MAY YOU CONTINUE TO BE WITHIN ME, GIVING ME POWER, SHOWING ME GRACE, IN MY TIME OF NEED. I know that this is how God works because I see it. May God continuously dwell in me and lead me on.

I really feel God's peace at work, for the most part. There are always times of stress (daily, oh yes), but my prayer for my year is to NOT stress out to the extreme about things that I cannot control. I do my job with whatever strength the Lord gives to me each day, and I try to listen more to God than to myself and my own intentions. If that means that I go down the hall and talk to another teacher for 2-hours, so be it. If that means I work on things for the classroom for 2-hours, so be it. I want badly to have the intentions of the Lord. They definitely do not always match, but I pray that my wishes will continue growing closer and closer to God's wishes each day.  

Col. 3:15:

"15Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful."

I pray that I will not take my God for granted.

Flexibility. That's a word that we use all the time, especially in special education. Sometimes, my daily lesson plans are pushed to the side. My flesh says--argh, stick to the schedule! But God places in my heart: DEAL WITH WHAT HAS JUST AROSE! I WILL HELP YOU! I WILL KEEP YOU CALM! If you know me, you know that this is a huge challenge for me. I like schedules, I like order, and being flexible will always be a challenge for me. 

I have seen the Lord at work in my life because I see that I am continually changing. Since becoming a Christian, wow, have I changed. Age 15 seems so long ago. . .and I thank the Lord that over the years, I have grown into a different person. My sanctification is a continuous process, one that I love to be able to see because I want to change. I want to be more like Christ. 

I have daily schedules because I know that to do my job with excellence, I must prepare my heart and mind daily to serve my students to the fullest. However, I am more capable of changing these schedules at the "drop of a hat." This Thursday, I had to go over my classroom rules for AN HOUR. That is so much instructional time it's crazy to comprehend. However, God helped me understand that without doing this, we would lose ever more instructional time dealing with later behaviors. 

Ps. 46:1:

"1 God is our refuge and strength, 
       an ever-present help in trouble."

How true is this? God is the only way. 

He is an ever-present help, even when I don't know what to ask for, who to ask for help, or what to do to best serve others.

I pray that the Lord will continue to guide me and that I will follow willingly without complaint. Lord, I love your love.