Promises

God just really encouraged me. Last year when I found out I got my job at JLL, I felt that the Lord was helping me to be content in staying in the US for just a bit longer. Those children He gave me--well, they made the stay completely worth it.

I was so thankful, I went and bought a ring that says "love" on it. This was to signify that the Lord loves me too much to leave me, to forsake me, to forget me, or to not keep His promises to me. He has my best and all believer's best in mind.

This past fall, I broke my ring finger. I was very sad because ever since, the ring has not fit, so I haven't been able to wear it. A few minutes ago, I saw it in my drawer and I pulled it out. For the first time in 7 months, it fit.

This encouraged me because it reminds me that even though things are a little crazy right now, the Lord WILL keep His promises to me. He will use me in the field of teaching to reach many for Him. No matter what happens with my current situation, I know that He will continue keeping His promises, just as He has always done in the past.


Yay, thank You sweet Lord!

In addition, today I put up a huge world map on my wall. It's actually cloth from Wal-Mart, but you wouldn't believe how difficult it is to find a map around here! I loved putting it up and looking at the nations--the Lord has truly burdened my heart for the people of the nations, and I am thankful for this rather large display to remind me of them.



Until we "meet" again,

Serve the Lord!

Letters of confusion

Confusion. There's always plenty of it in life. I am certain that I am not the only person who gets mixed signals sometimes. . .

Today I got a letter in the mail from the PSC. . .these are the people who decide which Georgia teachers get certified. Since my program does not give initial certification after receiving a bachelor's degree, I am not yet certified. Upon being hired as a teacher, I was told that the BOE would complete all my necessary paperwork to get me certified. When they hired me, they knew the circumstances. Now I get a letter in the mail telling me that they have received my application for certification, but they are lacking on key piece of paperwork: a form filed by my college of choice recommending me for certification. This is interesting. I have no idea how others have been hired without this--but I haven't finished my master's yet! Hence, this paperwork won't be completed until I am finished with my master's.

I am not going to lie. This puts me in quite an interesting position. I do not know what is going to happen. I have already signed a teaching contract, so I would love to say that this is just a bump in the road that can be easily fixed. However, I know that this is not the case.

Now I am waiting to get an email from the head of the certification process at VSU. Will I maintain my teaching position? Who knows; I will let you know later.

I write all of this to say the following:

1. James 4:13-15:
"13 Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will^[a] go to such and such a city, spend a year there, buy and sell, and make a profit”; 14 whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away. 15 Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that.”
If I am supposed to have this job, then the Lord's will overrules everything else. I pray that I will not fixate on what may be taken away, but instead, look forward to however the Lord will use me during my vapor-like life.


2. Matthew 6:33, 34:
"33 But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble."
Throughout this process, I have sought You, O Lord. I pray that You will calm my heart, help me see that this is what is good and pleasing to You, and love me despite my doubts and shortcomings.

Isaiah 43

Isaiah 43:

Israel's Only Savior

1 But now, this is what the LORD says—
he who created you, O Jacob,
he who formed you, O Israel:
"Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
We are redeemed; praise the Lord! We are called by name; not "hey you!" Lord, You know each believer intimately. Praise You for Your care and love, which is better than life.

2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.

We will never be forsaken, forgotten, or forbidden from being in Your presence. I thank You for being with me when the rain and storms loom on the horizon, just waiting to crash down upon me. Praise Your name for never removing me from Your Holy hand, and never leaving me in the flood to drown myself in my own sorrow. You pick me up when I am down, You set my feet upon the solid rock. Just as any great Daddy would. . .that's Who You are to me.

3 For I am the LORD, your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;
I give Egypt for your ransom,
Cush ^[a] and Seba in your stead.

Look at You care for even the birds of the air. . .what will You withhold from me? Nothing. All good things are from Christ. I desire to praise the Creator, not the creation.

4 Since you are precious and honored in my sight,
and because I love you,
I will give men in exchange for you,
and people in exchange for your life.

Thank You Lord for purchasing me at such a great price. I trust that You will continue to wash me clean each day, refreshing and rejuvenating my sinfully and naturally black soul. When You look at me, I am white as snow. That is the cleansing blood of Christ.

5 Do not be afraid, for I am with you;
I will bring your children from the east
and gather you from the west.

I love this verse, Lord. It comforts me in ways I cannot describe. It doesn't say, "Try not to be scared. . ." it is a command! We ought not fear, for You are with us; not one meant to be with You will slip through Your hands. Ah, the beauty of being selected by an omniscient, omnipresent, and ALMIGHTY God.

6 I will say to the north, 'Give them up!'
and to the south, 'Do not hold them back.'
Bring my sons from afar
and my daughters from the ends of the earth-

Sons and daughters. . . :-)

7 everyone who is called by my name,
whom I created for my glory,
whom I formed and made."

We are created to glorify You, as a body; I pray that I will glorify You in my Words, thoughts, and actions.

8 Lead out those who have eyes but are blind,
who have ears but are deaf.

You are a FEARLESS leader for the fearful.

9 All the nations gather together
and the peoples assemble.
Which of them foretold this
and proclaimed to us the former things?
Let them bring in their witnesses to prove they were right,
so that others may hear and say, "It is true."

All the nations will serve and glorify You together. Thank You for letting me hear Your Word in another language. I can think of few things more moving or beautiful. Seeing brothers and sisters in Christ so far away is so encouraging. . .You will conquer all; You already have!

10 "You are my witnesses," declares the LORD,
"and my servant whom I have chosen,
so that you may know and believe me
and understand that I am he.
Before me no god was formed,
nor will there be one after me.

What an honor. . .You have made us witnesses. It is not our job simply to witness every once in awhile. . .You call us to BE witnesses! Please, use my words as Your own to bring many to you. May not want others to know You for myself; may my intentions be pure. . .that I will desire to see those souls truly know and love You.

11 I, even I, am the LORD,
and apart from me there is no savior.

THE ONE TRUE GOD. . .how great a gift to know You!

12 I have revealed and saved and proclaimed—
I, and not some foreign god among you.
You are my witnesses," declares the LORD, "that I am God.

13 Yes, and from ancient days I am he.
No one can deliver out of my hand.
When I act, who can reverse it?"

No one can reverse the mighty and awesome deeds You have done. . .I praise You for being an unchanging God in an ever-changing world. You are my stability, my stronghold, my safety zone.

God's Mercy and Israel's Unfaithfulness

14 This is what the LORD says—
your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel:
"For your sake I will send to Babylon
and bring down as fugitives all the Babylonians, ^[b]
in the ships in which they took pride.

15 I am the LORD, your Holy One,
Israel's Creator, your King."

You are the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. . .

16 This is what the LORD says—
he who made a way through the sea,
a path through the mighty waters,

You parts seas for us Lord, You break down barriers. Thank You for making all things possible for our good and our growth!

17 who drew out the chariots and horses,
the army and reinforcements together,
and they lay there, never to rise again,
extinguished, snuffed out like a wick:

18 "Forget the former things;
do not dwell on the past.

Live for the present. . .do what I can for those I love today. . .we aren't promised tomorrow. . .and we certainly can't change the past!

19 See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the desert
and streams in the wasteland.

20 The wild animals honor me,
the jackals and the owls,
because I provide water in the desert
and streams in the wasteland,
to give drink to my people, my chosen,

21 the people I formed for myself
that they may proclaim my praise.

22 "Yet you have not called upon me, O Jacob,
you have not wearied yourselves for me, O Israel.

Lord, please let me weary myself for You. I love You so much, please use me to bring others to You.

23 You have not brought me sheep for burnt offerings,
nor honored me with your sacrifices.
I have not burdened you with grain offerings
nor wearied you with demands for incense.

You do not desire sacrifice and offerings. . .simply a relationship. Thank You for being a very relational God, One who both likes and loves His children.

24 You have not bought any fragrant calamus for me,
or lavished on me the fat of your sacrifices.
But you have burdened me with your sins
and wearied me with your offenses.

Even though I am certain that I have so many sins to share with You, I know that You still love and accept me. Lord, I confess that I have a multitude of shortcomings. . .but You do not focus on my flaws! You love me! Thank You!

25 "I, even I, am he who blots out
your transgressions, for my own sake,
and remembers your sins no more.

I thank You for making me clean, whole, and new.

26 Review the past for me,
let us argue the matter together;
state the case for your innocence.

27 Your first father sinned;
your spokesmen rebelled against me.

28 So I will disgrace the dignitaries of your temple,
and I will consign Jacob to destruction ^[c]
and Israel to scorn.

What a great God, what a wonderful Maker, what a faithful, peaceful Lord. I thank You for Your great blessings, for Your forgiveness, and for allowing me to be what I've always desired to be: a daughter.

My Franklin

"Franklin" -Paramore-

"And when we get home, I know we won't be home at all
This place we live, it is not where we belong
And I miss who we were in the town that we could call our own
Going back to get away after everything has changed

'Could you remind me of a time when we were so alive
(Everything has changed)
Do you remember that? Do you remember that?
(Everything has changed)
'Could you help me push aside all that I have left behind
(Everything has changed)
Do you remember that? Do you remember that?

So we stand here now and no one knows us at all
I won't get used to this
I won't get used to being gone
And going back won't feel the same if we aren't staying
Going back to get away after everything has changed

'Could you remind me of a time when we were so alive
(Everything has changed)
Do you remember that? Do you remember that?
(Everything has changed)
'Could you help me push aside all that I have left behind
(Everything has changed)
Do you remember that? Do you remember that?

Taking up our time
Taking up our time
Taking up our time
It's taking up our time
go back, we can't go back at all
It's taking up our time
go back, we can't go back at all
It's taking up our time
go back, we can't go back at all
It's taking up our time, taking up our time

'Cause you remind me of a time when we were so alive
Do you remember that? Do you remember that?"



This song really makes me think. Two of my best friends and I went to see Paramore in concert last weekend--it was quite an experience. Amidst other deep subjects, this particular song has always made me hope that Christ is infiltrating the people in this band in some way. From my Christian viewpoint, I really feel like this song speaks to me because I AM an alien in a foreign land. Sometimes it is overwhelming because I feel a sense of sorrow upon coming "home." As much as I love my room, my roommates, and my apartment, it leaves many things to be desired. Mainly, the Father. I look forward to that day when I reach my eternal home.

Hmmm.

Heb. 11:13, 14:
"13All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance. And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth. 14People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own."

1 Pet. 2:11, 12:
"11Dear friends, I urge you, as aliens and strangers in the world, to abstain from sinful desires, which war against your soul. 12Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us."


I said goodbye to my students today. . .it's been an emotional week. I love them more than . . .well, more than I can explain. And to imagine that my pain is only a tiny portion of what the Lord feels like when we "leave" Him. . .

A prayer

Isaiah 55:1-13:
" 1 Come, all you who are thirsty,
come to the waters;
and you who have no money,
come, buy and eat!
Come, buy wine and milk
without money and without cost.
Lord, may I not turn to cisterns of my own; cisterns that are broken and hold no water. May You fill me up with your unfailing love. May I learn to accept Your free gift that is GRACE and not try to earn enough to buy what You give me for free because You first loved me. . .

2 Why spend money on what is not bread,
and your labor on what does not satisfy?
Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good,
and your soul will delight in the richest of fare.

May I delight in You and You alone. All good things are from God. God, even yesterday You gave me a Port-a-Potty and found my Chapstick while I was at the beach. . .my soul delights in even the simplest things You do for me. I do not deserve these things, nor do I desire to try to attain them. Lord, may I feast on You in all of Your goodness.

3 Give ear and come to me;
hear me, that your soul may live.
I will make an everlasting covenant with you,
my faithful love promised to David.

Faithful promises abound from You God. . .yet I am never faithful to You. Though I constantly commit adultery and turn aside to false gods who can do nothing for me, You are faithful to your covenant. I am the seed of Abraham because of my belief. Thank You.

4 See, I have made him a witness to the peoples,
a leader and commander of the peoples.

5 Surely you will summon nations you know not,
and nations that do not know you will hasten to you,
because of the LORD your God,
the Holy One of Israel,
for he has endowed you with splendor."

Splendor describes You fully. . .thank You for being WONDERFUL.

6 Seek the LORD while he may be found;
call on him while he is near.

Why can we not pray constantly? It makes no sense; this verse tells us to call on You! You are always there, always concerned, always listening. May I seek You for my needs; may I praise You when You give and take away.

7 Let the wicked forsake his way
and the evil man his thoughts.
Let him turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on him,
and to our God, for he will freely pardon.

Lord, You FREELY pardon our sins. No work, no payments, no debts that cannot be met. Daily bathing. Daily cleansing flood of blood. Divine blood. Your Son's blood. The blood of life. Nothing but the blood saves. If we will simply turn to You, confess, and believe, You would bless that immensely. May pride not stand in my path to You.

8 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,"
declares the LORD.

You are high and exalted. . .there are none like You. None to compare You to, none to meet Your goodness. I praise You for that.

9 "As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.

I'll never understand You entirely, but I don't have to. :-)

10 As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,

11 so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

Your Word will NOT return void. . .no matter how I may state my feelings for You. . .I know that if Your truth is involved, it cannot be proven wrong. Your Word is the BEST way to influence others; to bring them to the Gospel Truth named CHRIST. Wow. No matter what I say, people will hear what You want them to hear. It's a win-win situation.

12 You will go out in joy
and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field
will clap their hands.

Thank You for nature. . .it cries out about You as I do not.

13 Instead of the thornbush will grow the pine tree,
and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the LORD's renown,
for an everlasting sign,
which will not be destroyed."

Your name and Your renown is the DESIRE of my soul. As the deer pants for water, so my souls longs for You. Lord, thank You.

Rest for the weary

Ah, rest.

Gen. 2:1-3:
"1 Thus the heavens and the earth were completed in all their vast array.

2 By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested ^[a] from all his work. 3 And God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done."

Today after church I rested. God rested after all of His glorious work in Genesis. I was so overjoyed to be able to have a break. A day where I did no school-related activities (aside from checking out my grades!) and I could rest, make it through the headache, clean out all of my scrapbook supplies, and transfer and organize thousands (literally) of my pictures on my computer.

The longer you've gone without a true break, the more you appreciate the simple things like this. For me, I'd rest for a bit, but still be required to study each day and be productive. I thank God for allowing me to have such a great day full of things I enjoyed immensely.

Mark 6:30-32:
"30The apostles gathered around Jesus and reported to him all they had done and taught. 31Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat, he said to them, "Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest."

32So they went away by themselves in a boat to a solitary place."

Jesus commands us all to take time out to ourselves. How wonderful it is indeed! In the spare time I've been blessed with, I've been able to have some really great, intimate, life-altering conversations with the Lord. . .God is a conversational God. He likes to chat. :-)

This month is a semi-rest period. . .not that I don't have many things to do in preparation for my new job, but I will have time to read for fun. I've already started rereading "Praying God's Word" by Beth Moore. And I ordered a book called "Morning and Evening" by Charles Spurgeon. I LOVE reading Spurgeon and all of those "great" men of faith. . .I appreciate the language they use and the passion they speak with.

Rest. It was great to be obedient and do it.