Let me begin...

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Welcome, Fall!

Well, today begins what officially seems to be our lovely fall season.

I am very excited! I love fall and winter--they are such fun seasons. Plus, I must admit that I have great disdain for summer. It has it's purpose and place on the calendar...but it is my least favorite season.

Now come the beautiful colors of leaves, the holidays, SNOW ( I HOPE!!), and plenty of time for sweaters, coats, and boots.

THE BEST!

Plus, last year I missed all of fall and most of winter...especially fall. I couldn't see at all during the fall, so viewing the shades of red, yellow, and orange seems thrilling.

Now if only the Lord would take away the nightmare I call work...but then what would I be learning?

I guess my continual faltering has a great future purpose. The drama may later proceed to having a fruitful harvest of "AHA!" moments.

While I'm living/surviving it, I can't see the immediate benefits of my current predicament. And it does feel like "survival of the fittest" at this point...

...but I know it won't be without good in the end.

I have to rethink this every five minutes. Tick tock.

Sunday, September 11, 2011

My many names...

As followers of Christ, we are often exposed to new facets of ourselves....sometimes at an alarming rate.

We have many hats to wear, right?

Lately, I've been thinking of all the names I've ever had, past, present, and future. I will talk about some of them here, and others are just for me to think about in my own moments of "deep thought..." but no matter what, we play different roles in the lives of others...sometimes for a period, sometimes for eternity, sometimes until the last breath of life here.

All this to say, we can't sum up the question, "Who are you?" with only a few words or a sentence...instead; we are summed up in SO many words. We can't look at a person and place a singular label on them without considering the fact that we are only seeing one snapshot of a very oddly shaped person. Oddly shaped and still being molded, in fact.

Most of us start as someone's baby. In fact, all of us start this way, even if we aren't claimed, then opening up a whole new can of worms. As a baby, we are dependent on someone to meet all of our needs and desires. We need food. We need a rocking chair. We need a non-stink-infested diaper. ;)

Then we get a little feistier. We become either "son" or "daughter" rather than people simply referring to us as "the baby" (which happens by force of nature...and also sometimes because hey, you just can't tell!). Still having our needs met, but attempting to meet some of our own independently.

Moving on up, you get into that labeled crowd: the goody-goody (that was me), the jock, the really loud person, the bookworm (also me), the cheerleader, the drop-out, etc.

Finally, things start to get serious. The "CAREER" labels begin. You're a doctor, a lawyer, a cafeteria worker, a gardener, a teacher, a mother. A wife, then becoming a best friend on a whole new level, thus more labels! The best cook, the cleaner, the organizer, the queen of the social calendar, the hugger, the listening ear.

After you hit the career labels, you might take a sweep down "Specifics Lane," saying you're a "hard worker," level-headed, spastic, that you over-analyze everything, that you're a "Fixer" (this is me), or that you're a go-getter.

As a mom, you're a teacher, a doctor, a nurse, a personal trainer, a psychologist, a therapist, a garbage woman.

As a teacher, I am a booty-wiper, a snot cleaner, a speech coach, a sign language interpreter, a mind reader, an expert at using google to find pictures, and a big fan of Boardmaker.

WOW!

So who am I really? To each person, I show up with a different label of who I am or who that specific person wishes me to be.

To break it all down, I think it goes back to that son and daughter phase. What we often do not realize that all of these labels that define us are our finite attempts to place labels on who we are when we just can't figure out what God is trying to tell us.

Hey, I think I'm good at this, I'll try it awhile. OK, all done, on to another label to figure out who I am.

I find myself being one of those very specific people, often forgetting that yes, there IS in fact just one word that I can describe myself was being...and that word is DAUGHTER. And since I like to be specific, I'd make a sentence fragment: "Daughter of a King."

Of course, from there, I could go on to make the diagram....but for now, I need to focus more on letting GOD tell ME who I am rather than trying to figure it out for myself or let someone else try to define it for me.

For now, I pray that I will allow God to continue to mold me into the person He wants me to be. Honestly, we are all still in the child phase and will continue to be there...we have a Parent providing our needs and protecting us even through our failed attempts at being independent....because at the end of the day, He knows that we want to be tucked in by Him even if we were "mad" at Him all day.